Hotel St. Augustine Rating: 2.5 Pearls

South Beach, Miami, Florida

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Hotel St. Augustine

A small, 24-room Art Deco building constructed in 1937 alongside a row of residential buildings and just south of the South Beach action, St. Augustine is set apart by its entrance. No apartment is this clean. Inside, there's Bailey, the resident chocolate Lab, who refused to pose for my camera (but was otherwise cuddly). Given the hotel's small size and guests who generally keep to themselves, St. Augustine can feel like a home away from home -- but this means guests might have to wait a few minutes for the front desk clerk to arrive. But it's still fairly upscale, with pristine white walls showcasing colorful and engaging paintings by Luis Camejo. Want to take a painting home? They're for sale!

Drawing locals as well as guests, the Tangerine Bar in the lobby is a clean, minimalist nook with bright orange cushions. Though St. Augustine is surrounded by popular So-Fi restaurants, like über-trendy China Grill, most of the neighborhood is residential. (So-Fi is the local term for "South of Fifth," meaning its just south of South Beach proper).

The front desk

There's no doorman to help guests with their bags or open the door, and there's no room service (well, there's no restaurant either). The St. Augustine is a DIY kind of place. It's really just a clean, quiet, comfortable place to crash.

Still, after I coughed a couple of times and waved my arms around, the receptionist (and his dog) came bounding up to the front desk to happily check me in. He also very helpfully gave me directions to neighboring restaurants.

View on a Larger Map

The small, two-story hotel is in a row of similarly sized residences along Washington Avenue on the southern tip of South Beach, otherwise known as So-Fi (South of Fifth Street, get it?). It's four blocks from the beach, which is only about a two-minute walk.

So-Fi is an up-and-coming area with legendary restaurants like Joe Stone Crab, Nemo, and China Grill. It's a five-minute walk to see these chic restaurants, or clubs like Love/Hate (started by cast members of "Miami Ink"), or great dive bars like Ted's Hideaway, but the street itself is quiet enough for guests to get a good night's sleep.

This far down, the broad beach with its white sand looks like it's out of a dream-vacation catalog. Really, it's that nice! Expect a young, gay-friendly crowd partying it up till late at night in the spring and summer.

The shower in "Loft Q"

With only 24 studio-style rooms on two floors, St. Augustine is a small hotel with a bed-and-breakfast vibe. However, the hotel features a sleek minimalist design like most of South Beach, rather than fussy kitsch.

There's no elevator, but a short flight of stairs brought me to a long, clean, and unassuming hallway that led to my room. While the number of beds may change according to what guests book (rooms come either with one king, one queen, or two double beds), all the rooms follow the same basic plan -- they are large, they are white, and they have an open bathroom. This means that there is no door separating the bedroom from the bathroom. Instead, the large sink and generous mirror are in an alcove by the foot of the bed. To the right of the sink -- in my room -- is a separate room for the toilet and the glass-enclosed shower.

St. Augustine's Web site brags about its steam shower, and I admit it was impressive. There are three jets on the wall and one overhead -- a surprisingly luxe feature for a budget hotel. Activating the steam-shower setting basically turns the stall into your personal sauna, as steam is released from a vent in the floor. On the downside, it also steamed up the rest of the room, so be sure to leave a window open.

My platform bed was comfortable, but the thin blanket was scratchy and didn't keep me warm enough. Plus, the large window by the head of the bed posed a dilemma -- close the blinds and cut off natural light, or leave them open and look into the neighboring apartment? A few palm trees help to separate the hotel from its neighbors, but peeping Toms can still make out their neighbors...and presumably vice versa.

There's a writing desk, a media tower with a small TV, CD player, and a mini-fridge all stacked one on top of the other. The TV has a full range of cable channels, but on mine the sound kept fluctuating for no apparent reason. This was the first tip off that the room is actually a little cheap. The second sign was when the lock fell out of the mini-fridge.

My biggest complaint -- the enormous air-conditioning vent right by my bed pumped out cold air at a tremendous velocity, despite my tinkering with the temperature controls. Every few minutes it would wake up with a roar that was frankly terrifying, especially at 3 a.m. And I'm not alone, TripAdvisor reviewers have complained about the same thing.

Breakfast in the Tangerine Bar

The hotel is only a few blocks from the beach, but besides the complimentary breakfast at the Tangerine Bar in the lobby, St. Augustine offers nothing else. Well, nothing else except for free Wi-Fi...though I was only able to connect to it in the lobby.

There's no fitness center on site, but guests can take a discounted lesson at the neighboring South Florida Boxing gym, where one of Mohammed Ali's former trainers allegedly teaches classes. Still, I feel obligated to point out that the gym offers discounted rates to guests at all hotels in the area, not just guests at St. Augustine.

It doesn't have any kid-friendly amenities -- well, besides the adorable doggie in the lobby -- but cribs are free. Roll-away beds come at the relatively steep price of $25/day. And remember, it's a maximum occupancy of four people to a room.

While 90 percent of the hotel is absolutely pristine, there were a couple of slip-ups that caught my eye. For starters, there were some obvious smudges and stains on the door to my shower. Then, on closer inspection, I found a rolled up piece of foil paper under my bed. With no bed skirt or carpet to hide it, it should have been noticed by housekeeping, especially at a hotel this small. Still, I was hard-pressed to find dirt anywhere else.

Breakfast in the Tangerine Bar

There's a complimentary continental breakfast served every morning at the Tangerine Bar under the stairs by the lobby. Spread out on the bar, guests can pick from three types of cereal, Danishes, croissants, coffee, milk, and orange juice. That's the only food guests can get at the bar, as the hotel only serves drinks in the afternoon and evening.

To make up for the lack of a proper restaurant, the hotel allows deliveries from La Locanda, a tasty if somewhat pricey Italian restaurant a block away. There's a menu in every room, but I'd encourage visiting the charming restaurant itself.