Dylan Hotel Rating: 3.0 Pearls

Midtown East, Manhattan, New York City

Mood-lit lobby

A 1903 Beaux-Arts chemists' club-turned-midtown boutique -- "CHEMISTS' CLVB" is still engraved above the entrance -- the 107-room Dylan offers the once sleek (now ho-hum) mood-lit style of design industry mogul Jeffery Beers. (Beers was most recently lauded for his $1 billion renovation of the Fontainebleau in Miami.) But rather than the fashion industry elite, the crowd here is a bit more down to earth -- middle-aged couples, Italian tourists in "I [heart] NY" T-shirts, and executives stretching their expense accounts on steak and scotch at the Benjamin Steakhouse.

The Dylan opened in 2000 under the ownership of New York real estate magnate Morris Moinian, his first foray into the hospitality industry. He gave it the name Dylan simply because he liked the name -- there's no fun history there. When it opened, the hotel was heavily hyped, enough so that Britney Spears blessed the space with her NYLA restaurant, which failed spectacularly shortly thereafter.

Forgive the obvious metaphor, but much like Britney Spears, the Dylan has seen better days. In 2007, Moinian sold it to Eurostars, which has a low-profile stateside but maintains a vast portfolio in Spain and other European countries. (Moinian now owns the forthcoming New York location of Hotel Indigo).

But the Dylan is still a stylish hotel at a fair price, and Oyster's editorial team selected it last February as one of its two "test hotels." This means that we sent about a dozen reporter applicants overnight to cover the hotel as the final phase in our lengthy application process. (The other test hotel was On the Ave, in the Upper West Side.) Based on the quality of these reporters' critiques and the spark in their writing style, only one applicant actually made the cut: Mike Taylor. As such, the following review is a composite work based on both his investigation and my own.

Friendly waiters at Benjamin Steakhouse

Though there was no one to open the door for me or take the three heavy bags slung over my shoulders, check-in operated smoothly and professionally, and I was up to my room within minutes. The front desk even called shortly afterward to make sure I enjoyed the room. (I did.)

In the evening, I requested a bucket of ice from the front desk, and they said it would be up in five minutes. As promised, it was at the door in five minutes exactly. (We use a timer for these things, and it was down to the second. Amazing.) Same deal with towels: up in five minutes, though not to the second. (I was sort of hoping they had some kind of electronic super-system in place, like the bullet trains in Japan, but no luck.)

The next morning, room service omelets were delivered to my room in less than the promised 20 minutes (18 minutes, 12 seconds, to be precise).

View on a Larger Map

Located on a somewhat dark, less notable side street, the Dylan is a comparatively short building surrounded by corporate skyscrapers -- a fragment of old New York surrounded by new New York. Nearby, local taverns cater to the happy-hour after-work crowd.

The Dylan is two short blocks from Grand Central Station, which includes the 4, 5, 6, 7, and S subway lines as well as Metro North trains that run up through the Hudson Valley and Connecticut. B, D, F, and V subway trains are two blocks west at Bryant Park.

Bryant Park is well known for its summer movie series and winter ice skating rink. There, you'll also find the New York Public Library, a site equally famous for prestigious literary readings (Salman Rushdie was among the guests during my visit) and for the lion statues out front (which came to life in Ghostbusters).

New York City has three nearby airports: JFK, La Guardia, and Newark (in New Jersey). Flying into JFK or LaGuardia is typically easiest and the least time-consuming. From JFK, it's a (one-hour) $45 flat-rate taxi ride to anywhere in Manhattan. From LaGuardia, it's about a (30-minute) $40 metered cab ride to midtown Manhattan. Rides from Newark cost at least $40 (plus tolls), and can take more than 90 minutes. Don't forget to tip your driver 15 to 25 percent.

To save some cash, try the group shuttles that are available at all three airports for about $14 per person. For more information on the shuttles, go to Super Shuttle or New York Airport Service. You can also take public transit from any of the airports for as little as $7 per person, but travel can take up to two hours and involve a lot of lugging bags up and down stairs.

For mass-transit directions right to the hotel, check out HopStop.com.

White marble bathroom in The Executive Room

Upon entering my room, I found it hard to shake off the eerie, green glow from the hallway. In the shadow of neighboring skyscrapers, with dark blue carpets and white walls lit like an alchemist's laboratory, the rooms evoke a permanent haze straight from a Robert Louis Stevenson novel. The chemistry-lab setting comes complete with graduated drinking beakers and a petri dish for the soap. The furniture is "modern" from five years ago, and the slightly nicked furnishings lack the luster of their original black lacquer. But the beds -- with high-grade linens and a down duvet -- are very comfortable.

The Dylan has 59 standard (called "luxury" rooms) with a king or queen bed, ranging from 190 to 225 square feet (about average for a New York City boutique). As with many boutiques, though, the beds are "European queens," meaning they're closer to an American double -- don't expect any indulgent sprawling. The next largest rooms are "double doubles" (two double beds), which range from 235 to 295 square feet. Executive rooms range from 225 to 275 square feet. There are also three junior suites, which are 385 square feet each. In short, most Dylan rooms are on the small side, particularly compared with the nearby Bryant Park Hotel, where standard rooms start at 300 square feet.

Smoking rooms are available, something that is somewhat rare for New York, where you can't even smoke in a bar. While neither my colleague nor I smelled anything in our nonsmoking rooms, some reviewers on TripAdvisor weren't so lucky.

I stayed in the standard, "luxury" room, and outside the window the ventilation system next door made the room sound like an airplane cabin. Likewise, the obnoxious, wake-your-roommate voosh of the toilet flush was akin to that on a Boeing 747.

A 32-inch LG flat-screen TV comes in every room. But in my room, the picture tended to be a little grainy. There's an iHome iPod dock, and free Wi-Fi is available (as is a plug-in connection).

The narrow closet comes stocked with a robe and slippers. As for the mini-fridge in my room, there was nothing more appealing in it than a room-temperature can of Coors. But the thing that really got to me was the absence of cold water in the sink. The sink has two dials -- one hot, one lukewarm -- so every time I got thirsty, I had to initiate an ice-cube-and-warm-water experiment.

The bathroom was just as small and plain, with white marble tiling and a glass shower partition. Toiletries were by Gilchrist and Soames. Despite a shaving kit and toothbrush under the sink, the selection and quality were a bit below that of many other New York boutique hotels.

Small fitness center

The clean but cramped fitness room was stuck in the basement, with nothing more than a couple old Star Trac treadmills, two bikes, a Stairmaster, and a multifunction weight machine. A single TV was running CNN in the corner, though since the room was deserted, I was able to change the channel to whatever I wanted.

As of last February, the 3rd-floor business center was stripped of its computers and converted into a TV graveyard -- a storage room for all of the old TVs the Dylan removed from the rooms but didn't feel like throwing out -- with butcher paper over the front window to conceal the eyesore. Still, the free Internet connection is strong throughout the hotel, which is quite a feat for a building that predates the transistor radio.

The hotel's website touts its 650-square-foot meeting room; I question whether 50 people could really fit in the bland, windowless room, as the hotel claims. In short, other hotels in Midtown East have much better (larger, more stylish, or both) meeting rooms.

Though the Dylan's vibe seemed fairly staid and not like a particularly fun place for kids, the hotel does offer 14 "double double" rooms with two double beds, and cots can be brought into every room at an additional cost of $35. (Cribs, however, are free.) The Benjamin Steakhouse even offers a kids' menu.

On the whole the room was clean, but the scratched furniture, scuffed walls, bubbling ceilings, and a fair bit of mold in the shower grout definitely didn't hold up to the Dylan's once-hyped prestige. The closet doors didn't close easily -- you have to manually move the metal clips, or, as I did, attempt to bang the doors shut a few dozen times, re-squeeze your jackets into the closet, briefly panic about having broken something, and attempt to ignore the problem by moving the doors into their most inconspicuous, near-closed position. The dark carpets were worn, especially in the hallway.

Benjamin Steakhouse

The Benjamin Steakhouse, a popular restaurant even among New York locals, is on the ground floor of the Dylan and also provides room service. For dinner, the menu is blissfully basic -- steak, pork chops, baked potatoes -- but the Chilean sea bass gave my friend what she called a "moment" (a state of euphoria otherwise only attainable through dark chocolate and adult situations). The restaurant also serves breakfast for hotel guests -- everything from delicate, fresh fruit crepes to, naturally, USDA prime New York strip steak and eggs -- and at lunch serves a lighter, cheaper version of the dinner menu.

The Benjamin pulled one of the top chefs from the famed Peter Luger Steakhouse in Brooklyn -- a New York insititution -- so guests basically get the same food as Luger's in a much more convenient location, and with a classier decor.

The service at the steakhouse was phenomenal, maybe too good -- thanks to the constant hustle and bustle of the servers, there was hardly enough time for all the buttoned-up executives to make their stock-market small talk before their entrees arrived. As for this lowly reporter, a swarm of bow-tied staff cleared plates and poured water at every turn, my food was on the table within seconds (the steak still sizzling), and, for good measure, three different clean-shaven suits (management) came by to make sure all was well with the meal.

A tour of the block yields such quick eats as Chipotle, McDonald's, and Subway, and high-quality cuisine is also readily accessible.